Vedika - Day 276

Baby completed 9 months yesterday. Soon, her life outside the womb will be longer than inside. She is also making rapid advances in learning.

She has picked out 'bye' sound and is very vocal about it. Once her bye-ing starts, it doesn't stop short of about 30 bye-s. She also moves her head sideways to indicate 'no' and often it's what is implied, though we are not sure if she understands that this gestures means 'no'. She'd always indicate 'no' when attempting to feed her yet open her mouth.

Two days ago, she fell down from bed and cut her upper lip and bloodied her face. Next day she fell from her father's lap when he sat on ground. Such falls and accidents are soon going to be part of growing up but they break the heart. Her howls are heart wrenching.

Vedika got her Measles injection yesterday but was exceptionally brave and cried for no more than 30 seconds when injected. She is 71cm tall with head girth of 43cm and weight of 7.6kg. She gained about one kg in last three months. According to this chart, she should be 70cm and 8.2kg.

Vedika - Day 262

Finally! Baby makes a move.

Vedika was observed dragging herself on the floor in short spurts today. She pushes herself on her elbows and lifts her hips to move forward. As of now she does this infrequently and for short distances.

She has also picked up clapping surprisingly fast. Yesterday, there wasn't any. Today, they won't stop. Of course, her claps don't make noise yet, but she is enjoying clapping whenever she is happy, which she is for most of the times these days. Baby really has grown up suddenly.

Her acute hearing sense is visible even more. Her head turns quickly to locate even faintest of noise.

She is smiling much often, laughing still sparingly. Is able to stand holding up longer, likes to stand and climb up. Three small teeth are making their way on her upper gums.

She has finally become one who is looked forward to meet after long day at work. Cannot wait to see her. Miss her leaving in the morning. Happy times ahead!

Vedika - Day 248

Vidhi has learned dexterity with fingers now. Her cutest task (recently) include gently tapping keys on keyboard of laptop.

Vidhi has demonstrated fascination with laptops early on. One reason could be ubiquitous use of them by her mom, dad and chachu all around. She would leap from arms of whoever is holding her to be able to touch the laptop. She would typically, until about two weeks ago, bang her palms and enjoy whatever pops up on the screen because of that. These days, though, she seems to be treating it with bit more respect. She'd still bang her palm on keyboard but after that gently tap few keys couple of times (as shown in picture) before lifting her hand and banging again. To aid to her merriment, we've given her an old non-working laptop (with blank screen shown in picture). She definitely likes to work with them!

Her improvement in object maneuvering is visible in others areas too. When pulling a toy behind a wire, she now knows to first move the wire aside, and then pull the toy. She has learned to lift and rotate larger objects too such as small plate or plastic bottle. She has recently started to enjoy the sound things make when banged together or against the floor.

Her bodily strength also shows marginal improvement. She can hold her neck and torso very well now. When turned upside down, she'd arch her back to resist full flat hanging. She has shown potential to rise by herself when lying down to come to sitting position.

When she wants to talk she'd make long 'aaaa' sound clearly trying to communicate something. She likes to be thrown around, lifted up, moved, turned, etc. Baby is becoming bratty and we are loving her!

Day 246

Pictures from 8th month of Vidhi...

Day 242

Happy Diwali Vidhi!

Day 240

This is the day Vidhi would like not to know, but for sake of completion on her journal, and for inevitability of such incidents with infants, following shall be mentioned.



I was negligent, admittedly, for I was busy reading book and didn't see her poop. It must have been about 10 minute when something caught corner of my her. Vidhi has been playing with something like a ball, except that, her ball was with me. As you can imagine, she had soiled herself quite well — quantum being more than normal, to make matters worse — and had started playing in it. When she was taken to bath, her arms and dress were well covered with scraps of stinky stuff.



I am sorry beta, but it's a story to tell nonetheless!

Commandments of Detective Fiction

Continuing from ...Why Agatha Christie is better than Aurther Conan Dyle

"Twenty rules for writing detective stories," by S.S. Van Dine, 1928 (Source)

1. The reader must have equal opportunity with the detective for solving the mystery. All clues must be plainly stated and described.
2. No willful tricks or deceptions may be placed on the reader other than those played legitimately by the criminal on the detective himself.
3. There must be no love interest. The business in hand is to bring a criminal to the bar of justice, not to bring a lovelorn couple to the hymeneal altar.
4. The detective himself, or one of the official investigators, should never turn out to be the culprit. This is bald trickery, on a par with offering some one a bright penny for a five-dollar gold piece. It's false pretenses.
5. The culprit must be determined by logical deductions -- not by accident or coincidence or unmotivated confession. To solve a criminal problem in this latter fashion is like sending the reader on a deliberate wild-goose chase, and then telling him, after he has failed, that you had the object of his search up your sleeve all the time. Such an author is no better than a practical joker.
6. The detective novel must have a detective in it; and a detective is not a detective unless he detects. His function is to gather clues that will eventually lead to the person who did the dirty work in the first chapter; and if the detective does not reach his conclusions through an analysis of those clues, he has no more solved his problem than the schoolboy who gets his answer out of the back of the arithmetic.
7. There simply must be a corpse in a detective novel, and the deader the corpse the better. No lesser crime than murder will suffice. Three hundred pages is far too much pother for a crime other than murder. After all, the reader's trouble and expenditure of energy must be rewarded.
8. The problem of the crime must he solved by strictly naturalistic means. Such methods for learning the truth as slate-writing, ouija-boards, mind-reading, spiritualistic séances, crystal-gazing, and the like, are taboo. A reader has a chance when matching his wits with a rationalistic detective, but if he must compete with the world of spirits and go chasing about the fourth dimension of metaphysics, he is defeated ab initio.
9. There must be but one detective -- that is, but one protagonist of deduction -- one deus ex machina. To bring the minds of three or four, or sometimes a gang of detectives to bear on a problem, is not only to disperse the interest and break the direct thread of logic, but to take an unfair advantage of the reader. If there is more than one detective the reader doesn't know who his codeductor is. It's like making the reader run a race with a relay team.
10. The culprit must turn out to be a person who has played a more or less prominent part in the story -- that is, a person with whom the reader is familiar and in whom he takes an interest.
11. A servant must not be chosen by the author as the culprit. This is begging a noble question. It is a too easy solution. The culprit must be a decidedly worth-while person -- one that wouldn't ordinarily come under suspicion.
12. There must be but one culprit, no matter how many murders are committed. The culprit may, of course, have a minor helper or co-plotter; but the entire onus must rest on one pair of shoulders: the entire indignation of the reader must be permitted to concentrate on a single black nature.
13. Secret societies, camorras, mafias, et al., have no place in a detective story. A fascinating and truly beautiful murder is irremediably spoiled by any such wholesale culpability. To be sure, the murderer in a detective novel should be given a sporting chance; but it is going too far to grant him a secret society to fall back on. No high-class, self-respecting murderer would want such odds.
14. The method of murder, and the means of detecting it, must be be rational and scientific. That is to say, pseudo-science and purely imaginative and speculative devices are not to be tolerated in the roman policier. Once an author soars into the realm of fantasy, in the Jules Verne manner, he is outside the bounds of detective fiction, cavorting in the uncharted reaches of adventure.
15. The truth of the problem must at all times be apparent -- provided the reader is shrewd enough to see it. By this I mean that if the reader, after learning the explanation for the crime, should reread the book, he would see that the solution had, in a sense, been staring him in the face -- that all the clues really pointed to the culprit -- and that, if he had been as clever as the detective, he could have solved the mystery himself without going on to the final chapter. That the clever reader does often thus solve the problem goes without saying.
16. A detective novel should contain no long descriptive passages, no literary dallying with side-issues, no subtly worked-out character analyses, no 'atmospheric' preoccupations. Such matters have no vital place in a record of crime and deduction. They hold up the action and introduce issues irrelevant to the main purpose, which is to state a problem, analyze it, and bring it to a successful conclusion. To be sure, there must be a sufficient descriptiveness and character delineation to give the novel verisimilitude.
17. A professional criminal must never be shouldered with the guilt of a crime in a detective story. Crimes by housebreakers and bandits are the province of the police departments -- not of authors and brilliant amateur detectives. A really fascinating crime is one committed by a pillar of a church, or a spinster noted for her charities.
18. A crime in a detective story must never turn out to be an accident or a suicide. To end an odyssey of sleuthing with such an anti-climax is to hoodwink the trusting and kind-hearted reader.
19. The motives for all crimes in detective stories should be personal. International plottings and war politics belong in a different category of fiction -- in secret-service tales, for instance. But a murder story must be kept gemütlich, so to speak. It must reflect the reader's everyday experiences, and give him a certain outlet for his own repressed desires and emotions.
20. And (to give my Credo an even score of items) I herewith list a few of the devices which no self-respecting detective story writer will now avail himself of. They have been employed too often, and are familiar to all true lovers of literary crime. To use them is a confession of the author's ineptitude and lack of originality. (a) Determining the identity of the culprit by comparing the butt of a cigarette left at the scene of the crime with the brand smoked by a suspect. (b) The bogus spiritualistic séance to frighten the culprit into giving himself away. (c) Forged fingerprints. (d) The dummy-figure alibi. (e) The dog that does not bark and thereby reveals the fact that the intruder is familiar. (f) The final pinning of the crime on a twin, or a relative who looks exactly like the suspected, but innocent, person. (g) The hypodermic syringe and the knockout drops. (h) The commission of the murder in a locked room after the police have actually broken in. (i) The word association test for guilt. (j) The cipher, or code letter, which is eventually unraveled by the sleuth.

Edit 28/05/2015

More rules like this, and more more

Day 235

It's uncanny but whatever be the starting position of Vidhi on bed when put to sleep — and it need's always be parallel to edges as is conventional for adults, which in our case corresponds to West-East direction — she will always orient herself South-North during course of night. The turn is so precise and perfect that one wonders if she's a magnet*.



To be scientifically sure, of course, this experiment has to be repeated on different bed with different orientation.

*and as Radhika says, magnets orients North-South so, if she is reverse-magnet.

Day 215

Couple more photos from Vidhi's just concluded 7th month of existence as human on this planet..

Day 209

When we named our daughter Vedika, thesis was that this name is well meaning, cute, reasonably unique, short, foreigner-pronunciation-friendly and feel-good. Only concern that this name starts from letter later in alphabets was deemed immaterial and insignificant.



We also nick-named her Vidhi, particularly because we liked this name too and couldn't just choose one between the two, it's short enough too, and because we thought Vidhi is too cute a name and more applicable for a child but not possibly for an adult. In our mind, CEO Vedika Gupta sounded more professional than CEO Vidhi Gupta.



Of course, her pet name of Vidhi has evolved to Vidhu and even Veedoo. Such is life!

Day 198

Some pictures from 6th month of Vidhi...mid-Aug to mid-Sep

Day 195

It was quite a surprise to me to find that none of my parents, in-laws, wife and brothers noticed in first four months of Vidhi that pupils of her eyes don't move synchronously. Did I discover something new, when I first saw her in July, or was I imagining things? When her mummy and Chachu confirmed my 'discovery', we got a bit worried if her lack of aligned movement of pupils is a potential eye defect or not? Could it turn in lazy eye at later stage...



Apparently not. Not, as of today, that is. We had her eyes checked by an opthalmologist today and she confirmed normal vision. Her eye muscle coordination will improve over time as does rest of muscle coordination does. If she still doesn't move her pupils simultaneously by age two then we'd need to start worrying again.

Day 185

Things Vidhi has learned over last few days...



To be able to sit, unsupported for as long as fifteen minutes, but bracing herself on her arms.

To be support her neck much more stably without wobbling.

To be able to look up when sitting thereby lifting weight of her head on her neck muscles.

To be able to manipulate things when picking, say, moving one out of way to pick another.



She often continuously kicks her feet in air even when lying down, making a motion we termed 'air football'. She has actively started pushing away our faces and hands when going near her face to ward off barrage of kisses that she (naturally?) finds strange and even annoying.

Day 175

Since Vidhi started turning over couple of weeks ago, she has picked up quite fast and does it now as routine. However, until few days ago, she would always support her torso on her elbows while facing down and look ahead. Recently though, she has learned/realized the ability to collapse her arms at elbow and lay her face down facing straight to floor or to side. It's one of those simple things which are quite amazing when you think about it. Latest adventure was when two nights ago we found her sleeping on her stomach for the first time, face calmly turned to her left side.

Day 167

While we've been noting how Vidhi is progressing and crossing various milestones of infant life, today I want to talk about what she is not doing. This provides opportunity to differentiate nature/innate origin of certain actions/reflexes versus nurture/learned behaviours.



For example, among adults, yawns are highly contagious. In fact, you are probably yawning right now, just by reading the word. We don't observe the same with Vidhi yet, at age of 5.5 months and she can ignore yawns just as well.



It's obvious that language is a learned, yet it came to our surprise that following direction (when we point at things with out fingers or raise our arms) is also learned, even though, as adults, we cannot think otherwise.



My notion that infants will readily mimic whoever is around them is also shattered when Vidhi fails to open her mouth or move her palms/hands as we do, despite our obviously oversize gestures. It's been observed in kids a little older than her so I expect it will happen sooner or later, but it will be interesting to note where the boundary is.



As of now, Vidhi is unperturbed by her refection in mirror and isn't attracted to it. In steps of development of conscience, it is said that she will regard reflection as another person, until she come to realize that it's her, at about age of three.

Day 165

Vidhi got a tiny-tiny first tooth...a barely visible canine tooth on her bottom left!

Day 158

Vidhi now turns around quite frequently and seems to enjoy her new posture. She can also stay longer on her belly without crying though ultimately she does cry. If fascinated by new object then she tries hard to move herself. Currently she hasn't achieved any mobility but her efforts seems have seen progress from trying to grab things by her palms to trying to push herself ahead by lifting her bum.



Her efforts however do lead to her changing rotation and shifting slightly - an event which almost lead to her fall last Wednesday, twice! Once we overlooked her on sunbathing table beside our swimming pool (height 2 feet) and next time we just caught her in nick of time falling from kitchen counter (height 4 feet). We promise to be special careful now that she has shown signs of partial mobility. Her mom has already started putting heavy pillow at her side so that she doesn't slide off the bed when sleeping. Further, her relish at eating anything has only increased and she eats newspaper or even her own clothes. At times she makes chocking noises though no known cause could be observed. We really need to be more careful now.



She takes particular interest in our conversations now and will even pause her feeding if her mom starts talking to look around. She has also learned to make deep guttural grunting sounds which can be described by adults at what made when attempting to do a particular tough #2 job. She smiles a lot these days and shows genuine happiness at seeing her parents and Chachu. Her chuckle and laughter is loud and more fun filled. Her crying for no reason is little less than usual and she has become an more fun person to be with.



Some pictures from fifth month of Vedika i.e. Vidhi....

Day 152

Happy first Independence Day Vidhi!



Baby has learnt to follow what her mom lovingly calls Gandhigiri in not drinking milk She clenches her lips so resolutely and tightly without making too much sound or crying that feeding spoon into her mouth becomes a challenging task. Video will follow.

Day 151

Our suspicions of yesterday turned out to correct. Vidhi did learn to turn around and was observed (but not recorded for she failed to deliver under third eye) twice to turn over on her hands. Yay!



Excited dad soon sent an SMS to all near and dear ones which was chided as being little over the top by mom.

Day 150

A upturned ceiling facing Vidhi was found facing floor on her backside today while her mom looked away. It's not observed by anyone but it's possible that today marks the day when Vidhi learnt to turn over!

Day 141

We had some shopping to do and had to go to City Market for day long outing. City Market is a very crowded shopping destination famous for variety, price and no parking and walking space. If we took Vidhi with us then walking with her (even with help of maid) in narrow streets would have been difficult. If she was made to stay in car then cramped parking would not have provided best of places to spend whole day. For the first time we decided to leave our baby darling alone at home in care of maid and her Chachu while we went out for shopping. Maid did make some fuss about leaving such young infant alone at home and Chachu was exhausted from caring/playing/keeping a eye on her. We took about eight hours to return though to our surprise Vidhi behaved well during this period and didn't cry exceptionally bad. Sweet girl!

Day 134

So far Vidhi had access to all toys of her elder cousin Nitya and some of them started to show signs of wear and tear. We wanted her to have some more of teethers and decided that it's time we get her some fresh toys. We were bit disappointed to note that there weren't many options for her at young age of four months except teethers/rattles. However, our enthusiasm was not dampened and we ended up buying few teethers, rattles, and even toys up to twelve months old. Below is her loot...

Later that evening we went to a favourite Mexican restaurant for evening dinner. While we enjoyed burrito, nachos, falafal, etc. Vidhi tasted at least five menus and about same number of paper napkins. What would have waiter thought of the mess she made?!

Day 130

Today was first day when Vidhi was fed milk by her Chachu Mr. Nishant Gupta...

Day 128

Vidhi has been particularly cranky these days and can manage to cry for hours with no notice. At such times, her cries are blood curdling and will take anywhere between one to two hours to get under control. One wonders at ferocity of her screams that how can she cry even louder were something more terrible (say, physical pain) were to happen.



Recently we dared to go to Food Bazzar to do bit of weekly shopping. Her bouts of sobbing in middle of shopping soon turned into screams by the time we were into checkout and almost everyone from 100 feet turned to look at us. Same thing happened, again, few days later at Shooper's Stop. When that happens, I feel so embarrassed that I run with her outside even though her cries are enough to warrant a good look from every one. In case I am in middle of checkout, Radhika has to run to car to console or feed her.

Day 122

Some pictures from fourth month of Vedika i.e. Vidhi...

You are fired!

No other act has seen use of so many euphemism as corporate action of firing employee off. In quest to be as sweet as possible while doing the exact opposite, corporate HR should probably won some kind prize for coming up so many ways to not say what they want to. Not that I believe companies shouldn’t fire people, but it will be worth a bit honesty and ethics to not rub salt on it. Of course, honesty and ethics are kinds of things you wouldn’t associate with any big company anyway.

In the sprit of doublespeak, then, here is collection of what ‘you are fired’ may sound like:

assignment ended
assignment expired
best shoring
bought out
bounced out
career change opportunity
career transition
cashiered
contract not renewed
contracted out
decruitment
discharged
dismissed
down size
early retired
eased out
end of trial period
freed up for the future
going in different directions
headcount adjustment
headcount reduction
helped with exit
invited to be successful elsewhere
involuntary separation
laid off
let go
made available to industry
made redundant
make internal efficiencies
managed out
off shoring
optimized
outplaced
outsourced
personnel realignment
personnel surplus reduction
position has been eliminated
promoted to customer (retail workers)
pursue other opportunities
rationalize the workforce
reclined to extend
reduced headcount
reduction in force
re-engineered
regime change
released
released from the talent pool
relieved of duties
reorganized
re-prioritizing labor expenses
resource action
responsibilities have been reassigned
right size
separated
services no longer required
skill mix adjustment
smart size
stepped down
taking it for the team
terminated
unassigned
we really feel like we’re holding you back here
workforce efficiency initiative

Day 120

Vidhi has been in Bangalore for about two weeks now. She is developing into beautiful and smart infant and is absolutely adorable when not crying. Her fits of crying occur randomly throughout the day but are more prominent before her bed time between 9-10pm.



By now, her mom and I have developed a reflex kind of reactions to her tantrums. If you are watching her before she starts crying, you can see it coming about 5 seconds before as her mouth takes the position most conducive to high decibel noise generation. From sound of her crying, we can immediately decipher whether it is ‘come to me and pay attention to me’ call or ‘i am hungry or you can never guess what happened to me’ call. If it’s former, naturally, resolution is swifter. Just by coming into focus of her vision and making some soothing sounds, she will calm and start playing. If it’s later then, we go through a series of motions in trying to ascertain any reason for her distress.



Firstly, we’d check her nappy and make sure it’s dry. Next, we’d sooth talk her and caress her. Singing, clapping and other attention grabbing follows. Lifting her on arms and rocking her gently comes next. Her favourite songs* will be played then. Her mother will attempt to feed her. If by now, she hasn’t stopped, and about 15 minutes would have passed, we’d get bit worried and prepare ourselves for long haul. A quick search of her clothings will ensure that there isn’t any insect biting her. At this point, our order of motion will become bit random. Talking, sooth talking, singing, playing music, shouting at her, putting her on bed or rocking in arms will happen in random order. She will be passed among her mother, father and chachu. At the end of one hour, at worst case, she will typically calm down or fall to sleep. In such extreme cases only her mom remains the hope for any respite.



*Her mom claims that "ek ladki of dekha" is her favourite though I don't see any clear indication.

Day 118

Vidhi manages to suck her thumb — of her feet! (we didn’t manage to catch that moment though)

Day 113

Today was Vidhi’s fourth dose of vaccination: DPT and Polio. We found out a cheap nearby hospital since we just wanted someone to give her injections and didn’t need expert pediatric advise. Baby was nice as she can be and cried only a little when needles were inserted. Her measurements:

Weight: 5.2kg
Length: 59cm
Circumference of head: 39cm



According to this chart, she should be 6.4kg 62cm. Her doctors say expected weight is 5.5kg. Apparently there is different scale for Indian babies and American/developed nation's babies.

Day 111

Vidhi has been in Bangalore for about three days today. Her night time interruptions are at 4am and 6am. When she is not crying, she listens to songs on her mummy's mobile (particularly, Rooth Na Jaana Tum Se Kahoon To) or looks around. Few times in a day, she manages small chuckle or smile. One of her way to keep peace with herself is to suck her fingers.

Today, she had first outing on her pram and was taken around our apartment.

Day 106

Vidhi is on the way to her home for the first time! She started out from Shimla yesterday night, reached Delhi today early morning and left for Bhopal. After a overnight break at her Nana-Nani's house, she will start for Bangalore on Sunday and reach here by Monday.

Day 87

This post is about trip down the (near short) memory lane and recounts announcement of Vedika’s birth to the world.

This is SMS I sent to my friends:

India’s population++. Gender ratio infinitesimally improved. Plainspeak: It’s a girl :)

I had planned for sending at least somewhat different announcement rather than just simple ‘It’s a girl. Mother and daughter a doing fine.’ My geeky nature came up with above words couple of weeks before her birth and I had typed the SMS (with possibility of both boy and girl) the moment my wife went in labour. That I wasn’t with her, of course, gave me time to do such thing. Instance I came to know, I sent it to all.

Below are snapshots of reactions of our friends and families on her first announcement on Facebook which happened within 15-30 days of her birth.

• Chachu's announcement
• Papa's announcement
• Mummy's announcement

Day 82

Today, Vedika got her third dose of vaccination. She is acting little irritable whole day and is taking paracetamol every eight hours to avoid onset of fever. Apart from bit unrest, she seems fine.

Vedika - Day 78

Baby gets new gears!

(alright, these images are taken from web, but they show exactly how the stuff looks like, except that the carrier is in light blue colour)

Oh, I might add, these are her gifts from her Chachu & Kaku! Will upload with Vidhi in actual stuff soon.

Also to clarify those who bother, I am not buying pink stuff just because she is she. Maybe a pink bow...

Day 70

Baby Vidhi has reached Shimla with her mom. It's her first train and long distance journey. Apart from expected irritation from tiresome journey, she didn't exhibit any other worrying symptoms. Radhika had to sleep whole night on her side without changing sides on one birth so as to provide support and cover to Vedika and she definitely seemed unable to manage a good night's sleep. More detail as they come.

Day 67

Vidhi is showing signs of improved stability in her sleeping patter. She sleeps longer stretches at night and is awake for longer duration in day. Her kicks are growing stronger and she is becoming fond of gurgling and cooing when someone talks to her.



Heat in Bhopal is at its peak and has caused a little slowdown in her activity. Doctor has verified that her reduced activity is mere exhaustion from heat and is no sign of inherent malady.



Vidhi and her mom will travel to Shimla to her paternal grandparents two days later. That will be her first journey out of the house and first taxi/train/bus journey.

Links to share

1. Leading a team requires skills different from successful personal achievement. Here are nicely put tips for being a great boss.
2. Even in this day with GPS tracking, satellite mapping, Helicopter and what not, Amazon forests still remain out of reach of human. See fascinating narration of what lies inside through eyes of explorers who went in search of mythical city of Z.
3. Given this history, it is not wrong to assume that all government departments are wrong and ready to loot money. Frequent strikes by Air India workers seem to suggest entitlement. But every story has two sides. Here is a attempt to look from other side.
4. String theory suggests as many as 11 dimensions of Universe. Physical senses can see 3 dimensions. Brain can understand 4^th dimension of Time. Beyond that it’s mere imagination. But ain’t it fun!
5. Is character a well defined social concept?
6. There is science behind design of parking space and parking penalty!
7. And there is science behind walking: Part I and Part II.
8. Humans are fallible. Even those who sit at highest pedestal deciding fate of lives of people: judges. And they don’t make good decisions if they are hungry!
9. Look behind world of car salesman in US. Also good lesson in human psychology of selling.
10. The turning point of advertising: mix Sex and Ad.
11. Once American Airline decided to sell unlimited free flying passes for $300k+. It still lost. Because people just flew too much.?
12. Why do people overeat?

Cost of improper signage

Small things, yet very important. I am talking of traffic signage in India. Traffic signs are obviously very important for road users. They serve primarily two functions: information and warning. Informative signs provide directions, street names, speed limits, one-way streets, distance, nearest convenience facility, turn permissibility, and so on. Warning signs warn of work in process, diversions, traffic lights, stop sign, lane constraints, road block, weight limit, height limit, and so on. For drivers and pedestrians alike, they serve purpose to facilitate traffic, reduce inconvenience, reduce traffic jam, manage blockage and congestion, provide mental peace, and all in all are very helpful. In fact, I find proper signage so helpful — and this is not just limited to roads, but also in public areas like parks, hospitals, bus and railway stations, airports — that I feel instant gratification for that designer who decided to put a sign where he did in case I find one exactly when I need one.

In USA I’ve found signs to be absolutely well placed. Almost as if someone is reading my thoughts and the moment I feel I need directions, a sign happens to be right there as soon as I look up. This, unfortunately, hasn’t been the case in India. Indeed, while they are absolutely important to avoid unnecessary U-turns and save fuel cost and traffic congestion, I doubt anyone in Indian municipalities — which are responsible bodies for this kinds of works — pays any iota of attention to them. There are many problems:

1. Major issue is that there aren’t just signs where there obviously should be, like fork in the road or a flyover or traffic junction or closed road.
2. Content of signs leaves enough to be desired
   1. First, there is a issue of font size. There is hardly any standard for any sensible font size which can be read by driver is who driving at or below permissible speed limit. More often than not, it’s too small that you need to be parked to be able to read.
   2. There appears to be is no standardization on sign language too. Often for temporary signs (for construction work, for example, which in Indian case, temporarily last for up to couple of years) signs are not phrases but full sentence. Combine that will small font size and you are predestined to be unable to read it.
3. Biggest issue is of placement
   1. While vehicles are permitted on all lanes, sign is placed exclusively to cater to lane nearest to it, even when it is applicable to all lanes.
   2. Sign is too close to the point where decision based on that information can be made e.g. you are already on flyover when sign says where this flyover goes and where road below does, or sign on left lane is so close to junction that moving to left lane at that point is impossible, or speed-breaker sign is after speed-breaker.
   3. Sign is hidden behind an advertisement poster or an overgrown tree
   4. Sign has moved/shifted/turned by forces of nature and time or is misplaced in the first place where it points to direction which is wrong is vague (arrow marks the street where there isn’t any). This is specifically bad of places like Bangalore where concept of perpendicular road crossing is rare and you’ve multiple roads crossing at odd angles.

None of this, of course, matters to traffic police should they decide to cite you for violation. You may have driven on a road couple of kilometers before you see a speed-limit sign (if you do, despite above) yet you are expected to somehow know that and not exceed that. You may come across a traffic junction and keep looking if and where is the signal for you, for it’s either placed at strange angle or is behind a tree. Blind turns and road conditions ensures that one may drive at full speed only on roads where one has driven few times. Do not expect speed-breaker or turn sign will warn you. You will have to remember that. That and that pothole which is just there unannounced ready to engulf you with your car.

And improper signage is not just small annoyances. I personally have wasted quite a lot fuel and time on missing a turn or driving on a flyover when I am not supposed to. Subsequent course correction adds to unnecessary traffic congestion and caused road rage. Compared to investment of putting useful, readable, properly placed signs, returns on overall fuel, time, accident saving, and public convenience is expected to be high. I do not have numbers with me but I’d expect them to have one of highest return-on-investment for any public expenditure work. Yet, there is no future where I envision this will happen any time far.

Day 55

Received Vidhi's birth certificate from Municipality of Bhopal. They have misspelled my name and missed the 'i'. Let's see if correction works. If not, I hope, it won't be much of a problem.



On her front, baby darling is growing smoothly. She has started to respond positively to her mother's face and voice and smiles often. Her newest habit is sucking her fingers and fist. She seems to find immense joy and juicy delicacy in it for she ends us licking and sucking at her fingers often with sounds akin to eating tasty fruit. It's an constant source of amusement and annoyance to Radhika to make her stop doing this. We try not to encourage her to have a habit of sucking thumb.



Radhika also tells me that baby Vedika has followed family footsteps and have started watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S which is our family sitcom. It keeps her engaged for few minutes at least. Night 11pm-1am remains her favourite play time.

Birthday wishes

Birthdays are special occasion for most people. Special day, celebrated, purely because it happens to be the day on which the self, which, of course, is the center of known universe — not in cosmic sense but in sense of world around it — came into existence in its own conscience. An exercise in narcissism, no doubt, yet perfectly valid, for any other metric of time is intellectual, theoretical, abstract, and in any practical sense, immaterial. A person’s conscience has only one true timescale which runs from birth to death. Of course, why the day, and not moment, hour or minute, and why annually, and not in any other periodicity, is purely conventional.

Most people like to make their birthdays special day for themselves, affording themselves luxury of their favourite pastime, meal, indulgence, or anything that brings them happiness. Most of remaining people are generally upbeat their birthdays if not making a fuss of it. Rest, just let it be.

For those who care, of course, receiving birthday wishes is expected. It is desired from one to wish another birthday wish, if former happens to come to know about this, and is in presence of later, even if there is no familiarity between them. At their annual frequency, birthdays, naturally, become convenient touch points with people whom one would place in acquaintance category — not too friendly to connect often, yet preferable to be in touch with. Given that people expects and like being wished on birthdays helps the matter.

What doesn’t help, apparently, is the mechanism for helping you remember their birthdays. People expects, surprisingly, that you wish them because you remembered their birthday. This also applies to any wish-requiring occasion such as anniversary. An emphasis on expensive brain real-estate marks the importance person has in your life. Even if you took help of any of technological aids (calendar, reminder), you are not to disclose, for it will reduce well-being conveyed by your wish. No wonder impact of my ‘Happy Birthday’ drops a notch soon I tell them — only on being asked how come I remember — that I remembered it because I was reminded by my calendar system. I must pretend that I remembered. My getting external help seems to suggests farcical wish and not a genuine one. That I bothered to make note in may calendar and took effort to wish is easily swept away. Of course, wiser next time, I just remember. That is not to say that people don’t know it but they would rather not have this be stated explicitly. How many birthday wishes on facebook, a purely rhetorical question, mind you, are because your friend saw the reminder on top right? Yet, would one dare to draw the attention to the same? No one does, of course.

Seems I find this topic little more fascinating than I imagined — I have written on the same couple of years earlier too.

Day 54

Latest measurements...

Weight = 4.3kg

Height = 53cm

Circumference of head = 38cm



According to this chart, she is supposed to be 4.8kg 56cm.

Three Men in a Boat

When I started reading Three Men in a Boat by Jerome K Jerome, a humourous book written in 1889, I had not imagined that what lay ahead of me. Book is through and through hilarious story of three good-for-nothing lazy hypochondriac friends who decide to take one week trip along the river to help them relax. From story point of view, book offers little; rather, one can say that there isn’t really an story. Indeed what constitutes this 200 odd page narrative is collection of numerous meanderings off-shots tales which either recounts some historical episodes from protagonists past or are part of wild and vivid imaginations. Narrative is definitely old English yet flows freely and isn’t trouble to read or understand. In fact, this book affirms faith that despite hundred and quarter century of time difference and thousands of miles of cultural difference between me and them, basic human nature has hardly changed. If a minor annoyance must be noted then that should be about convoluted names and British history of various places on river they visit which a modern and non-British reader may find unfamiliar. Best way to present what is awesome about this book is exhibit collections of quotes from within. And if you don’t find them hilarious, then perhaps this book isn’t for you.

Book introduces our protagonists and their hypochondriac nature:

It is a most extraordinary thing, but I never read a patent medicine advertisement without being impelled to the conclusion that I am suffering from the particular disease therein dealt with in its most virulent form.

I had the symptoms, beyond all mistake, the chief among them being “a general disinclination to work of any kind.” What I suffer in that way no tongue can tell. From my earliest infancy I have been a martyr to it. As a boy, the disease hardly ever left me for a day. They did not know, then, that it was my liver. Medical science was in a far less advanced state than now, and they used to put it down to laziness.

And when they decide to take trip down the river:

…said, however, that the river would suit him to a “T.” I don’t know what a “T” is (except a sixpenny one, which includes bread-and-butter and cake, and is cheap at the price, if you haven’t had any dinner). It seems to suit everybody, however, which is greatly to its credit.

Describing one of the member of journey:

You can never rouse Harris. There is no poetry about Harris—no wild yearning for the unattainable. Harris never “weeps, he knows not why.” If Harris’s eyes fill with tears, you can bet it is because Harris has been eating raw onions, or has put too much Worcester over his chop.

Oh and oh, three men in a boat also have a dog with them. His introduction follows:

To hang about a stable, and collect a gang of the most disreputable dogs to be found in the town, and lead them out to march round the slums to fight other disreputable dogs, is Montmorency’s idea of “life.”

Montmorency’s ambition in life, is to get in the way and be sworn at. If he can squirm in anywhere where he particularly is not wanted, and be a perfect nuisance, and make people mad, and have things thrown at his head, then he feels his day has not been wasted.

Planning for the trip:

“Begin with breakfast.” (George is so practical.) “Now for breakfast we shall want a frying-pan”—(Harris said it was indigestible; but we merely urged him not to be an ass)...

And packing for the trip:

I said I’d pack.

I rather pride myself on my packing. Packing is one of those many things that I feel I know more about than any other person living. (It surprises me myself, sometimes, how many of these subjects there are.) I impressed the fact upon George and Harris, and told them that they had better leave the whole matter entirely to me. They fell into the suggestion with a readiness that had something uncanny about it. George put on a pipe and spread himself over the easy-chair, and Harris cocked his legs on the table and lit a cigar.

This was hardly what I intended. What I had meant, of course, was, that I should boss the job, and that Harris and George should potter about under my directions, I pushing them aside every now and then with, “Oh, you—!” “Here, let me do it.” “There you are, simple enough!”—really teaching them, as you might say. Their taking it in the way they did irritated me. There is nothing does irritate me more than seeing other people sitting about doing nothing when I’m working.

I’m not like that. I can’t sit still and see another man slaving and working. I want to get up and superintend, and walk round with my hands in my pockets, and tell him what to do. It is my energetic nature. I can’t help it.

And so on and so on. I could cite many, trouble being the given the wandering nature of book, quotes tend not to be just quotes but paragraphs themselves. Not good for blog but a recommended read. You have no excuse since it’s even free and available on Project Gutenberg.